Friday, 3rd September 2010
Contact us
Subscribe RSS Feed

You Know What I Don’t Like?: Overly Affectionate Couples in the Caf

Posted on 11. Oct, 2009 by K. A. Ratz in Column

You know what I don’t like? Well, you will soon.

I don’t know about you people, but to me, the caf is one of the most disgusting places in the whole world. And no, I’m not even talking about the food. When I go in to EAT somewhere, the only kinds of people I want to see are the kind that are EATING. Seriously, it’s a caf. It’s not like it’s Andre Lobby. Let’s get real here.
I buy my “food” and go sit down. I want to eat the dang food so that I can get to my next class on time. I want to see my friends so that we can all talk about how much we never get to see each other before we all run in seven-thousand different directions. I do NOT want to see people snuggling or running their fingers through each other’s hair or laughing in that ridiculous, obnoxiously high-pitched laugh at something that their boyfriend said that probably was not even that funny. It’s bad enough that I don’t have a boyfriend. I don’t need you all to rub it in my face.

You know, if you want to hold hands, fine. I just hope that one of you is left handed so that eating doesn’t get complicated. If you have to feed each other, then let go of the other person’s hand for 5 minutes and eat. Don’t eat off the other persons plate/utensils/fingers. Its gross. That’s a great way to pass the flu. Didn’t you learn anything in health class?

Maybe the best way to solve this problem is to break off a little section of the caf for the overly affectionate couples to sit. I don’t think it would bother them to have the other 40 couples being all lovey-dovey sitting near them if ALL THE PEOPLE IN THE CAFETERIA don’t. Maybe there is a purpose for one of those side rooms, after all. Perhaps another solution to this problem would be to eat your dang food and then go to Andre lobby or outside somewhere. Really, if you would stop touching each other and eat, that would only take you like 15 minutes. That way you still have like 30 minutes to go and snuggle and STILL make it to class on time.
The caf is a place for food. Not a place for you to get your hours worth of affection with your significant other. Food: YES. Touching: NO. Really.

Share:
  • Facebook
  • Twitter
  • email
  • Print

Tags: , , ,

  • Jenny Bae
    How old are you?
    If you dislike it so much, you don't have to look at them. You can turn away or eat somewhere else. One word for you: HATER.
  • Priscilla Miranda
    I actually DID get to see couples making out on the tables... or just a few inches from it. Thanks "K.A. Ratz," I enjoyed the exaggeration and the article very much, and believe me, I love LOVE. I just didn't pay so much money to have dinner AND a show in the caf. =)
  • Meagan Doud
    It is rather funny since, more than once, I have seen these overly affectionate people reaching hands down pants, tongues down throats, and other ventures into unmentionable places... all in broad caf-light. Not cute. And yes, deserving of a good rant. I could care less about people kissing. I, for one, was entertained.
  • Richard Hawkins
    Written in farce or not, this article seems to do little, yet alone entertain, so in that sense enjoy my "entertaining" responses to the article. Attempting to prevent people from being suspended over indecent activities, what is this?, elementary school now? if someone up here really does get suspended over kissing their signifigant other in the caf, we'll both be writing about an entirely different issue. Without knowledge of this article being written as a comedy, don't be so surprised when you get a comment from someone who doesn't like it.
  • Cara Tan
    @ Richard: I agree that people all over the world are constantly showing their affection, however I think the author of this article had different intentions. It seems to me that she was attempting to prevent people from being suspended for indecent activities. =D
  • Peter Katz
    This article, as with the dorm article, pants article, etc., was intended written as farce. The writer was well aware of the ridiculousness of his or her statements; please be respectful, and enjoy the entertainment.
  • Richard Hawkins
    I think that while discussion of one's distaste for seeing something they don't like is appropriate. In fact I love that we have finally a resource at PUC where we can discuss like this, out of the proverbial dark ages you could say. However I think this is a bit over the top.

    Put some things into consideration, humans need attachment, and PUC is a place where you can't have someone in your room, so I don't blame people for wanting some what of affection between classes. It's not as if people are laying on the tables making out, a kiss between couples, the hug before one goes to class, holding hands across the table, I just don't see the issue. Enjoying life with your significant other is something that is wonderful about college.

    I respect your opinion that it is not something you would prefer to see, but by that same token, there are alot of things I don't like to see up here, but have learned to live with.

    Why don't you consider having friends over with lunch so you have something better to do than worry about what the couple is doing a table away from you.

    A separate place for couples? Really?? Listen to yourself for a moment. A meal is not strictly about eating, but should be a chance to enjoy some time of peace for the day with people you care about. I have traveled the world, and wherever I go, weather it be Beijing, London, Brussels, etc etc, I find this facet of life, food and company to be pivotal, and such be no different at a liberal arts college in CA.

    Enjoy life, enjoy food, enjoy company, if this bothers you that much, respectfully turn your eyes the other way.
  • Cara Tan
    That was grossly exaggerated, inaccurate, and rather offensive. So, I'll just give the benefit of the doubt that it was a joke and you are Amanda's best friend. =D
  • Jessica Kremer
    By saying what you don’t like, you imply what you do... The opposite of hate is love.

    You don’t like affectionate couples. You do like people to be alone.
    You don’t like hearing laughter. You do like to hear crying.
    You don’t like to see people sharing food. You do like people to go hungry.
    You don’t like seeing another person happy. You do like misery.
    You don’t like intermingling of groups. You do like segregation.

    Sounds to me like you are the person with the problem. Remember Christ had hatred too, but hatred for sin, not the sinner. Hope that you aren’t alone and miserable forever Amanda.
  • cara
    amanda... i like your "pseudonym" muwahahaha
  • Isabel Withmory
    I will rub it in your face anyway. =)
blog comments powered by Disqus